“And What is Your Role?” – Tips & Testimony from Clergy Spouses

Picture it. You and your spouse (the pastor) are greeting congregants at your new church home. Smiles and warm handshakes all around. Conversation flows with your spouse about pastoral concerns and hopes for the church.

And then the congregant’s eyes turn toward you … “So, what will be your role in our church?”

How do you answer?

How can you answer a question so packed with expectations – past and future?

At best, you want to build a relationship with this congregation. At the very least, you don’t want to hijack your spouse’s relationship with the church. And most of all, how can you remain authentic to your own self in your response?

This dilemma proves to be the most gnarly issue among clergy spouses whom I coach during their transition to a new church. So, when we gathered a group of experienced clergy spouses for a “Tips & Testimony” panel discussion for new clergy spouses, we decided to capture their insights on video to share with you. Check it out!

Our panel members – Phil, Lisa, and Bernie – represent diversity in terms of tenure as a clergy spouse, childhood faith traditions, journeys to become a clergy spouse, ages of children, and work professions. We even have one preacher’s kid in the group! They are spouses of pastors in Lima, Hopewell, and Exton, PA. Please join me in celebrating their willingness, faith, and courage to be authentic with you in such a public forum.

And please let us know how this clip helps you, so we know where to focus in future postings.

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